Many men go through life carrying the attitude that life somehow owes them a girlfriend or a wife. That’s fair! One woman each, right?
Wrong.
Life doesn’t owe you shit. And life will not shed a single tear if your genetic line is unceremoniously cast into the dustbin of history.
Does the winning sperm shed a tear for the 249,999,999 losing sperm that die?
Nope.
Will life shed a tear for you when that woman you adore chooses someone else?
Nope.
The thing to remember is simply this: For men, it is a competition.
Knights with lances galloping towards each other at full tilt, clad in steel, the princess watching.
Do you think she gives a shit that you sent her a message saying “Hi, you’re beautiful”?
Nope.
As a man, everything that you are and everything that you achieve is on the other side of a wall and that wall is called hard work.
That’s the bad news.
The good news is that a large proportion of men either don’t know this, don’t understand how things really are and are suffering from terminal apathy: Their minds and bodies dulled by junk food, video games, alcohol, entertainment, Onlyfans and the various other forms of distraction.
As they say, fifty percent of success is showing up. Commit to self improvement, kill your television, stay off the couch and begin the journey towards greatness – and you are already in the top 50%.
Stick to your plan daily, even when you are not in the mood – and that probably puts you in the top 20%.
I have a sofa. Honestly I have only sat on it twice this year: Once when I was auditioning some new subwoofers I built and once when a gorgeous 23 year old blonde was in my arms. It’s September tomorrow. I’m in my 50’s.
I don’t have time to sit on the sofa. I have many amazing things to do – from training to piano practice to working on scaling my business to writing to preparing organic food to graphic design to producing tracks in my music studio. And so much more.
And I am still looking for more ways to optimize my time use. As Napoleon said, “You can have anything except my time.”
He knew.
Pink Floyd said “And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you. No-one told you when to run. You missed the starting gun.”
They knew.
Get to work. If you work in a balanced, even way on the four attributes of male self improvement, whether your preferred mind-map is the modern one of “Looks, Money, Status, Game”, whether it is the more esoteric “Lover, Magician, Warrior, Sage” or the more primal “Strength, Skill, Status, Empire” – it’s all good.
The goal is the same: Become the best version of yourself you possibly can. Develop your strengths and pull up your weaknesses.
You should really be giving that at least 90% of your available energy, veering towards 100%. “Trying to get girls” should be less that 10%, veering towards 0%.
The main shifts are, get TF off of Tinder, Instagram and Fetlife and get off the couch. Stop wasting time. Stop daydreaming. Take all of that time, that you waste every day, which is an astonishing amount, and apply it continuously toward becoming better.
The other part of this is to hyperoptimize your dating process – so that you can get the results you want without “the chase” consuming a large portion of your precious life. (See my tutorial on logistics and especially the “catch card” section, which is a time management secret weapon.)
Remember, the world is hyper-competitive and the dating marketplace is ‘globalized’.
She has a lot of options – and if you truly raise your game, you will have too. Once you hit a certain echelon of quality, you will find that you too have unlimited options.
Average, entitled men get the scraps. You might as well assume that means, they get nothing.
Footnote: The “One Woman Each” belief is actually a trope that has been sold to you by society. A “members benefit” if you like.
You don’t have to improve. You can be average. You can be a worker drone. You can stay in your lane, eat the cereal crops (slave food), stay numb, stay dull….. and have a wife.
But not that exciting a wife. One who carries society’s tropes and compliances around with her too.
It’s very subtle, and very pervasive. But this has been foisted upon you. It makes you lazy, dumb, fat and compliant. Smart enough to operate the machines but not smart enough to realize that you have been conned and not driven enough to do anything about it.
Hopefully this post gave you a jolt and got you fired up to attack your day. Get to work.